As I write this blog, I realize there are many different viewpoints out there. I make mine known in hopes of hearing from those of you who agree, disagree or fall somewhere in between. Some issues are cut and dry right and wrong and others are not. This issue of calling a day "Gotcha Day" is one that is not easily right or wrong.

Just for the record, "Gotcha Day" for some people is the anniversary of the day that either the adoption was declared completed or the day the family took custody of the child. Some families celebrate this day each year in numerous different ways. There has been great debate on what is a good term for this day and some debate on whether celebrating it at all is appropriate.

Each time I see a post on the Guatemala Adoption Forum that deals with this issue of calling a day "Gotcha Day," without fail I can predict the posts that will follow. Understanding that there are many that fall between these points of view, here are a few major ones.

There will be some that come back vehemently saying that this is such an offensive term to adopted children. The argument will be that it is the parents and family celebrating an accomplishment and not actually the child. The argument will focus on the fact that the term "Gotcha" relegates the child almost to a piece of property that was obtained. The term "parent-centric" is used quite a bit here. This indicates that the parents are only thinking of themselves when they are celebrating the adoption. It is more of a celebration of their journey rather than of the child.

Then you will find many posts the fall in the middle agreeing with the first posters that "Gotcha Day" probably does sound a little weird. They definitely do not consider their children as a piece of property. However, this is a special anniversary for the great majority of adoptive families and adopted children. These posters will share a variety of names used to mark this celebration (i.e. Family Day, Maria's Day, or even no name but just a celebration).

There are many who don't celebrate the day at all either. There reasoning is very simple. Life should be as normal as possible for the kids. It's not the fact that they are hiding their adoption. Rather, they just want to celebrate birthdays, Mothers and Fathers days, etc. so for them, there isn't a need for this celebration. They usually won't be over critical of those who do but they just choose not to have one for their family.

Finally there are those who will continue to us the term "Gotcha Day." This is what they have chosen and it has or will become part of their family tradition. I have yet to hear one of these parents say that they consider their children as a piece of property. The argument will be that the term "Gotcha" is actually and expression of love and passion for their child. Thinking back to that day I even have to admit, there are few words to describe those feelings after I heard "You adoption is complete" except that I took Mia in my arms and said "Baby I got you and I won't let you go...let's go home" (Translation= Gotcha).

My advice when you see this debate rise again (and it will) is this. Each adoption is so unique and personal to the individuals involved. When we join together as a community, we are dealing with different cultures in our own country and even greater considering the readership we have had from around the world. We won't ever agree on everything and by all means this is not an issue that should divide anybody. If you all this anniversary "Gotcha Day" do so from a passion for that precious baby. If your uncomfortable with it, call it "Family Day" or don't call it anything at all! If you don't even want to celebrate the day, recognize the gift you've been given each year by making a donation to an adoption charity. Help someone else be united and receive the gift that you were given.

OK so I know I've just scratched the iceberg of many of your opinions. Let me hear your thoughts.