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If you’d like to read an interesting and introspective blog, let me send you to one written by a Guatemalan adoptee, who recently adopted from Guatemala herself. One could say that she has a double perspective on adoption. She is also refreshingly positive and comfortable in her role as adopted daughter and adoptive mother.
However, like many of us out there, Meredith is not comfortable with the some of the adoptee rhetoric she hears.
“One thing that is making me sad is that I’ve seen so many adult adoptees who have written about how adoption is, in their opinion, horrible, and how it should be stopped. That’s really depressing to me. And then I started to feel like I was some sort of freak because I’ve had such a great life and because I am an adoption advocate.”
Meredith, you are certainly entitled to feel good about your adoption experience and your pro adoption opinions, and it is a sad day indeed that the very people who have felt ignored and shunned are consciously or unconsciously rejecting those who don’t feel the same as them. Here is what Meredith says about that: “I’ve wanted to write back to some of the people with opposite opinions to tell my side but end up chickening out.”
Not every biological child grows up to be a well adjusted, happy person who loves his parents unconditionally and has warm fuzzy childhood memories. However, I’m not sure as many have concluded that creating a family biologically is completely wrong and should be stopped.
This is one of my biggest problems with the conclusion drawn by some of the anti-adoption adoptees: that adoption is bad and should be stopped. I respect their pain and regret that their lives are filled with such sad memories. I’m saddened by the bitterness they feel on a daily basis; a bitterness that seems to grow with age. But stopping all adoptions is not, in my opinion, the right conclusion.
They need to remember that there are many people like Meredith, people who do not regret that they are adopted, and even go on to adopt themselves. Adoption in itself is not wrong because it is wrong for some people. Let’s try to remember that.
Thank you for making a very valid point, that not all biological children grow up to be well-adjusted adults, then how come only adoptions come under fire!